When dealing with your stomach its better to treat it like a 5 year old.
“I’m hungry!”
“Okay lets get you some food”
“I want chocolate cake and ice cream!”
“you can have some ice cream, but only after you eat your vegetables”
“I don’t want vegetables! Now I want Pizza!”
“When you eat nothing but cake, ice cream, and pizza you feel really bad. Here’s a steak, some rice, and steamed broccoli”
“FINE!..but I still want the ice cream afterward”
“You cleared the plate! Would you like some ice cream now?”
“No, I don’t want ice cream now. I want to take a nap”
It’s over when the Brain and Stomach team up to override you and you end up eating pizza and ice cream anyway.
To me thats more of: Brain stepped on a Lego and tripped smacking into the counter edge and is knocked out cold. Now Stomach is running wild and unchecked and pizza and ice cream in excess is consumed by Stomach. Brain wakes up sometime later to deal with the fallout and admonishes Stomach about the bad behavior and makes it promise to never do that again.
Why is there smoke coming out of your oven, Seymour?
Aurora Borealis?
At this time of year? At this time of day? In this part of the country? Localized entirely within your kitchen?
Pain is googling “instant heartburn relief” at 3 am. “Have you tried going back in time to eat less garbage?” as well as the suggestion to literally drink acid (apple cider vinegar).
Fuck. Suffered through life for years before getting a solid prescription for Omeprazole. Life changing.
Waking up at 3am breathing fucking fire because my stomach pushed up some of the worst acid is a hell of a thing to try and start understanding when you’re not even awake enough to understand what’s going on
I want to seymour stuff like this
Its shitpost not shit post
You’re a shit post
No u
Suddenly Seymour
🎵Standing beside you🎵
You don’t need no makeup
The conversation for me usually goes:
Brain: Hmm, I’m not doing anything, might as well eat.
Stomach: Yeah, I guess I could have a bite.
Brain: I’ve eaten, but there’s more pizza there. Guess I’ll have more.
Stomach: Please no, I’m full.
Brain: Hmm, two more slices isn’t really enough to save, I should eat it.
Stomach: God please, no. Let it end! I can’t take any more!
Brain: Oh! I just remembered we have some ice cream in the freezer!
Stomach: KILL ME! I WANT TO DIE!
Me: Ugh, why the fuck did I eat a whole pizza by myself…
