Looks like my account was banned/restricted for the above interaction, have already sent the mods on world an email asking if they’d be willing to reverse that. Had an episode of psychosis a few months ago where I did say some offensive stuff, (understandably) got a 3 month ban on .lol for that, so could see my account having been flagged.

I uh, I don’t think it’s reasonable to expect people to check others profiles to ensure we are correctly pronouning them… when making a throw away comment that is less than 10 words involving a ludicrously common saying. Jerboa does not show users pronouns. I could switch to an app that DOES show the pronouns, do any Lemmings have a recommendation for a free Lemmy mobile app that has that feature?

Edit: Edie chimed in, Jerboa does show pronouns. It’s a formatting issue with mobile vs browser (She has them on individual text lines so they don’t appear on mobile).

Was just going to respond to the user in question to let them know I wasn’t purposefully trying to offend that individual, to discover I’m not able to post or make comments on world now, so figured I’d see what y’alls opinion on the matter is.

  • ClassifiedPancake@discuss.tchncs.de
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    9 hours ago

    I don’t think it’s necessary to check every profile for potential pitfalls when interacting with them. But honestly, in this case there is an obvious transgender flag in the profile name that should make you at least question your first assumption.

    • ToucheGoodSir@lemy.lolOP
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      9 hours ago

      What percentage of the populace do you think knows what the transgender flag looks like? :|

      • REgon [they/them]@hexbear.net
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        3 hours ago

        Most of it, but that has nothing to do with you and is just a meagre deflection. The right response would have been “whoops my bad, didn’t notice that, I’ll do better next time” or a variation thereof.
        Shifting the discussion as you are trying to do is just poor behaviour that makes your alleged genuine questions seem much less so. Sort of how like when I misgender someone I don’t go and make a big fuss about it, dig my heels in and try to start a discussion about morality or expectations. I correct my mistake and thank the person for informing me of it. It’s not a big deal unless you make it one, which you’ve done

        • ToucheGoodSir@lemy.lolOP
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          5 hours ago

          Noo, it is an honest question. I’m a digital native, been to a decent amount of gay bars, even worked as security for pride in my city this year. Have probably seen the flag, have never had it come up that “yep this is the flag for the trans community”. Outside of Hamburgerland where transgenderism has become so politicized, huge press X to doubt people know what that flag is. Most folks on the planet are Indian, Chinese, or in an Islamic country of some sort. Now do tell, dear blakeus12. How do all of those cultures treat LGBTQ+ people :| if it was a question of how many people in the US recognized the flag, different story.

            • ToucheGoodSir@lemy.lolOP
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              5 hours ago

              You said it yourself in this comment. There aren’t queers there. Well, there are. They just aren’t treated very well if they’re open about it, to my knowledge. Logically, if a culture is “not there”, or in this context, being legally and culturally suppressed, I doubt there is going to be much awareness about things like which letters in LGBTQ+ corresponds to which flag. Id be happy to read something that you think would be enlightening on the subject.

              • ShimmeringKoi [comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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                3 hours ago

                To my knowledge

                Your “knowledge” is years of reddit threads and a lifetime of immersion in US imperial propaganda meant to dehumanize its enemies while justifying its own endless violent interventions.

                Before lgbtq rights, the excuse was spreading democracy, and before that it was “bringing civillization.” The truth is, the US doesn’t give a shit about their rights, it only cares about using them as an excuse for mass murder. They actively make life more dangerous for queer people around the world by using queerness as a human shield for their activities, same as Isreal does with jewishness, tying them together in the eyes of a casual observer, lying to its victims that “we are bombing you because you are homophobic/antisemetic and we are Jewish/queer” while it simply bombs them for their land and resources.

                America does not defend queer people, it puppets them into the line of fire.

                It’d be like if I kept you in a basement for 20 years, then murdered an entire neighborhood of people, then put up a billboard saying “I did this so ToucheGoodSir could have a place to live, because I love him.”

                And then other people looked at that billboard and said “wow, that ShimmeringKoi sure treats his friends well.”

                • REgon [they/them]@hexbear.net
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                  25 minutes ago

                  On top of all that America also just actively persecutes queer people. People will say “oh that’s just the republicans” as if that isn’t half the country and it’s not just the republicans, but a large group of democrats. Then they’ll say “oh, but we’re not as bad as [enemy of the week]” which funnily enough is actually a whatabouterismerino, but also not really a valid argument if you’re saying it’s okay to bomb a country if they’re mean to queer people. So it’s okay to be kinda mean to queer people?

                  On top of that there’s also the fact that some of the US’ closest allies are countries like Saudi Arabia, not to mention the many far right anti-lgbtq dictators the state has installed over the years.

                  On top of that the US has only recently gotten “good” on queer rights. Homosexuality wasn’t decriminalised in the whole of the US until 2003 (and we’re not talking some weird little forgotten law, it wasn’t until a supreme court decision forced several states to finally stop being bigoted.)
                  At the same time the GDR had decriminalised homosexuality by 1957 and with constitutional reform fully legal by 1968 GDR-emblem
                  The GDR did this despite inheriting the nazis legal code (according to a wikipedia source which I will not fact check.)
                  Would it have been acceptable, nay morally right, for the GDR to bomb the US?

                  honecker-interesting definitely, but not just because of da gays

              • LesbianLiberty [she/her]@hexbear.net
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                5 hours ago

                Shut the fuck up cracker, there’s no “reading” which can cover such vastly different regions of the world with their own queer histories. By bringing up your orientalist ideas of the global south you’re only proving your own stupidity. You clearly exist in a context in which the trans flag is common and a clear indicator to pay special regards to that user’s pronouns, and instead of just apologizing and moving on you’re making a mockery of yourself by trying to use your own racism to disguise your transphobia.

                • ToucheGoodSir@lemy.lolOP
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                  4 hours ago

                  If the trans flag was common to see and commonly talked about in Hamburgerland, I imagine I would have been more aware of what it meant. You’re calling me racist… While using a racial slur?

                  Ok, let’s whip out some facts. Of the countries in Asia where gay marriage is legal (different from transgender folk, yes I am aware, but I think we can all agree gays are a lot more accepted these days than trans people), there are 3. Nepal, the Republic of China (Taiwan), and soon Thailand. In Africa, there’s just one, South Africa. In the middle east, just Israel (maybe that’s how they keep getting American weapon shipments, they have a lock in the US gay Mafia).

                  Of course, in many more Asian/African countries than the ones I listed, it isn’t ILLEGAL to have same sex intercourse*. However feel that’s a decent metric for acceptance (and, by extension, awareness) of the various LGBTQ+ life styles.

                  • GarbageShootAlt2@lemmy.ml
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                    3 hours ago

                    No, gay marriage is what the US culture war pivoted on for a long time because it doesn’t involve disruption to normal cishet social currents and doesn’t require anything of the state actually be provided to people, plus it represents a benefit to the gay members of the bourgeoisie just as much as to the common person.

                    Furthermore, like in Taiwan, gay marriage in the US was not approved by referendum, it was basically a fluke from the Supreme court independent of other efforts. There are still nearly as many states as before where it is a large popular sentiment that if your kid is gay, they are sick, and state legislatures that are, as we speak, preparing to bring gay marriage back to the SC to get its protection removed.

                    Edit: As an aside, despite your chauvinistic, idealist view of cultures being “there yet” or not, using China as the example, lateral cultural differences also exist, and ignorance of these makes it very difficult to actively evaluate what a cultural attitude is. In China’s case, there is in most places a passive homophobia (which is still homophobia), but they generally don’t have the same homophobic culture war front that we saw in America. They are more like a broad, cultural “don’t ask, don’t tell”, which is in keeping with even Imperial Chinese traditions. There is obviously resistance to the existing movements to do things like legalizing gay marriage, but it’s a losing battle for the conservatives, who are mostly passive on this issue, and several of the practical benefits of gay marriage have already been won by other concessions, allowing gay couples rights concerning medical and financial decisions and so on through their guardianship system.

                    All this to say “Is gay marriage legal?” should not be treated as a binary for queer people having any recognition.

                    P.P.S. China also has multiple dedicated clinics for transgender people in various cities like Beijing and Shanghai.

          • GarbageShootAlt2@lemmy.ml
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            3 hours ago

            Most folks on the planet are Indian, Chinese, or in an Islamic country of some sort. Now do tell, dear blakeus12. How do all of those cultures treat LGBTQ+ people :|

            China has cities bigger than New York that are pretty trans-positive. These entities aren’t monolithic in their values, and in fact I would say they are more diverse in their values for better and for worse, compared to the US. What you are referring to is a cartoon perspective on these ~dozen countries spoon fed to you by western chauvinists.

          • communism@lemmy.ml
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            2 hours ago

            Most folks on the planet are Indian, Chinese, or in an Islamic country of some sort. Now do tell, dear blakeus12. How do all of those cultures treat LGBTQ+ people :|

            I’ve lived in at least one of the countries you’ve mentioned. LGBTQ+ people exist and live in the same capacity they do in western Europe and North America. It seems ridiculous for a westerner to try to implicate global majority countries for queerphobia when the US and UK are currently on a trans exterminatory cultural rampage. Stones in glass houses shit.

            • ToucheGoodSir@lemy.lolOP
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              3 hours ago

              Do you think the commentary on the Israelis controlling the US via their married contacts in the American gay Mafia is me propogandizing to white wash Israel?

        • ToucheGoodSir@lemy.lolOP
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          6 hours ago

          Globally? Dawg… how many countries in Asia and Africa is gay marriage even legal in, let alone some semblance and awareness of transgenderism.