Summary
The SEC has sued Elon Musk, alleging he failed to disclose a timely 5% Twitter stake in 2022, allowing him to buy additional shares at “artificially low prices,” underpaying by $150M.
Musk disclosed his stake 11 days late, after purchasing over $500M in shares, leading Twitter’s stock to surge 27%.
Musk’s lawyer called the case baseless, accusing the SEC of harassment.
This follows prior SEC investigations into Musk for alleged securities fraud and insider trading related to Tesla stock sales.
Musk denies any wrongdoing.
Alright folks, place your bets! Place your bets now and win internet points later if you have the gift of foresight!
( A ) Elon gets off completely free because the law doesn’t apply to people with his kind of money.
( B ) Elon gets a slap on the wrist because the law “technically” applies to people with his kind of money, but not really.
( C ) Trump shuts the case down because he doesn’t want his
sugar daddy“buddy” Elon to get in trouble.( D ) The SEC throws the book at him and Elon gets the maximum sentence, because Trump is fucking sick of the “President Musk” jokes.
( E ) Trump pardons Elon after a $500 million bribe.
And I mean bribe, like it would normally be illegal. But since he’s a Republican president, it’s perfectly legal
More likely that conservatives just use it as “proof” that the deep state is attacking conservatives, and then use that as an excuse to further defund the FCC.
It will be a called a “donation” or Tesla will spend the money on lobbying.
Why? Trump has been told that he can do anything. Bribery is like peanuts to this guy.
I’m betting he will straight up murder someone within his first year. Like directly. Not figuratively. Not through some sort of executive action.
First degree murder.
And every Republican will refuse to impeach him.
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It’s always A and I’m sick of it.
C and A
Hoping for D, but betting on A.
( E ) a and c, and the DOGE finds efficiency in eliminating the SEC.
I’ll take D, but in no way was it Tiny Handed Felon Trump’s idea.
I’ll take D
Damn right we will. Right in the A.
It’s okay, our new government department DOGE will tell the SEC it was more efficient
Our old government waited nearly 3 years to bring this lawsuit forward, and only did so days before Trump will take over. A fail all around to me.
good thing we’ve put safeguards in place to prevent someone with ongoing investigations of criminal wrongdoing from having power in the US government.
what’s that?
we don’t?
in fact the only sure fire way to get away with your crimes is to get power in government?
well i guess at least the world’s richest dickhead won’t have much power since he’s a neophyte.
what’s that?
he’s going to have the most power?
well that’s terrible. guess i should move somewhere safe, so called canada.
what’s that?
well fuck me.
You can’t go to Canada. They have effective boarder and immigration enforcement.
I wonder how bad things have to get before we can request political asylum.
If you’re LGBTQ+, you can already claim asylum. Been that way since the first Trump term.
yeah i know. but it’s still fascinating watching every american’s desperation hail mary country getting threatened with a little bit of anschluss
Yeah, this seasons writers are doing some great work.
baseless? There are specific disclosure rules he broke.
Right but the right’s entire thing is to scream “witch hunt” every time they’re caught for doing obviously wrong things.
Ha! How is failing to follow the rules of the market “baseless”?! This is insider trading. He should have filed a disclosure immediately after passing the 5% threshold
