I was trying to explain federated websites to a friend and she asked if there is a federated dating app. She recently went through a break up and the apps are dreadful as I’m sure many of you know.

It’d be hard to launch a dating system on the fediverse because it the type of service that relies heavily on network effects. People want to be on the dating app with the most people. However, I think there is an opportunity because the mainstream apps are so notoriously awful, monetized, and enshitified.

It could be a community within an existing network or it could be its own website. I don’t know, I’m just putting the idea out there.

  • Emotional_Series7814@kbin.melroy.org
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    24 hours ago

    I know about the app where women message first. I also know men set their gender on the app to be a woman, so they can message first, and proceed to spam with dick pictures. So I still won’t use it.

    I am sorry about the women who want but won’t give in return.

    If it’s worth anything to you, I’ve been the initiator in almost every romantic relationship I’ve been in. I’m a woman. Unfortunately I’m also used to being the initiator in all my relationships, including friendships, so I also want a guy to initiate with me, like the women you are complaining about… but that doesn’t stop me from making the first move anyways. Saying this not for “pick me” stuff (please don’t, nothing against you personally but I’m still a little old school in wanting to meet someone in real life first, not online) but to give hope that not all women are going to do all the things you are complaining about.

    I also won’t be found on dating apps because I’m convinced that’s a quick road to getting hit with misogyny, racism (I’m nonwhite in the United States of America), and idiot bigots trying to make me change my orientation (asexual, only romantically interested in men). I’ve never experienced it before, and I do not want to open the door to it. I have seen so many online complaints about how nasty people game systems meant to protect us (like in the example I gave about the app that makes women message first). So for anyone looking to make a Fediverse dating app, you might want to look into both how to prevent/punish that type of interaction, and how people get around it. I’m not actively looking for love but if I ever do I’m not going to be doing it online.