I’ve tried getting into peertube to have something to watch. I’m exploring copyleft music on open audio / funkwhale. I’m on here in lemmy as of this week. I’m playing with mastodon and the fediverse. I’ve tried studying psychology and psychology-adjacent territory like Deleuze and Guattari and Foucault and Derrida so I can break down what the Facebook algorithms are doing to me, how pop and mainstream music is designed and produced in conjunction with advertising to screw with our heads and make us buy things, how YouTube music suggestion algorithms screw with my head and ultimately make me buy things, and I’ve tried to start learning to code on a basic level at least so I can convert my chromebook to Ubuntu and hopefully my android phone, which I’ve paid off completely, to some kind of fully open source OS.
I’ve let my Netflix subscription wither away after just not paying it and try to not care about it anymore. I have no idea what to do about Amazon or Amazon Prime. I have some very important movies like ‘Unhinged’ and ‘Donnie Darko’ on there. I need to buy certain things in the present framework of my life right now, things that, in a small town with a particular disability keeping me from driving, I can only get on Amazon.
I’m doing a lot. But I still find myself jonesing for that death consciousness of mindlessly scrolling through Facebook totally vulnerable to an AI superpower extracting maximum profit from me perpetually. Moderation no longer seems remotely realistic. I can’t shut the machine out. Has anybody found anything else I could try? I’m trying to find as many little strategies as possible.
I think this is about where I realized your anxiety has more to do with your financial situation than your technology situation. Your worries are about the way you spend money, how much you spend, what you spend it on, and how corps try to part you from your money. Like another commenter said, all the free and open technology in the world isn’t going to magically balance your checkbook… though of course, it will help!
Yeah installing Ubuntu is great, learning to code is great, these are valuable endeavors if for no other reason than just to learn and try new things, but you don’t need to learn programming to “convert your chromebook to Ubuntu.”
If using Amazon is unavoidable, then it is what it is. There’s no shame in using them to get what you need. If you’re concerned about, say, your habit of impulse buying (not an accusation, just an example), you could try setting up a secured credit card with a spending limit so you can only use it for exactly what you need.
Block Facebook in your router settings (or get a Raspberry Pi, install Pihole, and set up a block rule there). If you need Facebook to communicate with friends and family, could you rely solely on Messenger? That way you don’t need to see anything on Facebook other than your DM’s.
If your mental health is dire enough that all that’s not enough, you probably need a therapist. You can even get it through some tele-health programs (YMMV). Hope this helps!