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Joined 2 months ago
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Cake day: May 6th, 2026

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  • “You’re gay, so you’re going to represent the company at the gay pride parade.”

    “I’m not gay.”

    “Yes, you are.”

    “No, I’m not. I’ve got a wife, and three kids.”

    “You act gay.”

    “How do I ‘act gay?’ I’m just myself”

    “That’s the problem. Your ‘self’ is gay.”

    “WTF?That doesn’t make sense, I’m not gay.”

    “Are you disparaging gays? Because I can get HR involved with this, if your going to start getting bigoted about gays.”

    “I’m not bigoted about gays, my brother is gay, I don’t care, but I’M NOT GAY!”

    “Yes, you are. Be in that parade, or you’re fired.”











  • Best parenting advice: Love what your kids love, and your kids will love you.

    I once saw a guy in a suit, having lunch with his teenage skater-kid son in Chipotle. The line wound past them, so I could hear the kid telling his dad all about the latest episode of Dragonball Z in excruciating detail, as the Dad nodded absently, and looked like he wanted to die.

    I went home and told my son my “Love What Your Kids Love” philosophy, and said that when he was young, if he had wanted to talk to me in excruciating detail about some dumb anime thing, I would have…had to cut him loose. Sorry, I just couldn’t do it.

    He thought that was hilarious. He hates anime.