I’d say drawing textures.
I opened this question and realised with a sense of dread that I don’t think I have an answer to this question; often it feels like my days are slipping by without making meaningful progress in the things I care about.
That may or may not be true, but regardless, I’m going to use this space to improve at self forgiveness. It’s difficult to show myself the compassion I deserve as a human, but it’s easier if I try to think of myself as a dear friend. If I were my friend, I’d feel proud of me for my strength, and angry on my behalf at the fact I am having to endure so much bullshit that is holding me back. I’d feel sad, but hopeful for the hypothetical future where I might be more free to make progress on my goals.
Without a frame of reference, I don’t think this constitutes improvements on anything per se. However, by setting my flag down here and underscoring my intent to be kinder to myself, I am creating a future where I will be able to look back on this comment and think “wow, such progress”. The second best time to plant a tree is now, and all that.
I’m slowly beginning to understand Japanese enough that I can turn off subtitles and still understand like 25% of what’s being said.
Meanwhile my ability to read it is starting to fall because I haven’t turned the romaji off and I keep finding myself reading that and not the katakana/hiragana/kanji.
Patience. I think I just no longer have the energy to get that uptight about things. Benefits of being a quinquagenarian, it would seem. It should come with some damn benefits other than back and joint pain.
I’ve been getting better at making small but meaningful changes to my life by recognizing that a lot of it is simply habit/routine, making an earnest effort at thinking of ways in which I can modify them, and making an earnest effort at applying them.
Very generally: Think of something I do that I might want to curb, think of why that thing is what I do, think of things I could do that would impede on my ability to do those things, and implement those changes.
Couple specifics:
I’m fond of beer. I don’t binge or anything but if it’s in the fridge I’m probably gonna grab one every couple of hours, and that’s not too healthy and kind of a waste of money, so now, when I buy beer I just toss a couple cans in the fridge and put the rest in the cabinet above the fridge. If I run out I’ll toss a couple in the next day. Now I drink a lot less because I’m not gonna drink warm beer and when I open the fridge I see the scarcity and tend to just shut the fridge and walk away.
I’m an introvert and I love reading about things and events, non-fiction crap, walking around on Wikipedia and stuff. It drives my wife up the wall when I’m doing and I don’t blame her because I’m bad at listening when I’m not giving my full undivided attention, so I removed all my phone chargers except for the one in the bedroom. Now, I just set my alarms and plug in the phone, walk into the other room, get out of that headspace, and engage my wife in conversation.
I like your beer trick. I’ll see if I can make use of it myself.
Nothing, if anything I’ve gotten worse at things.
Now, whose fault is that?
They could have a deteriorating condition :/
Or they are a 35 year old male suffering from depression who blames everything and everyone else in the world for their suffering other than take an ounce of blame for their situation.
I’m not some tough guy who typically preaches “pull yourself up by the bootstraps” motivation. This guy needs a reality check.
This may seems harsh, but I reccommend people take a look at platypus’s profile (the person ninemiletower is calling out).
They are 35 years old, have posted a lot of this sort of stuff, and have not actually mentioned any physical issue or disabilities over the course of their very public pity party.
Pity party? I’m commenting how fucked is my life, because that’s the reality I’m living, I never asked to feel bad for me.
No I don’t I already live that reality.
If they do, they have never mentioned it over a fairly long course of posting “everything sucks” and not accepting any advice. Check their posting history.
What advice? “Change your life, move outside, study” that’s middle class shit, I’m not allowed plus my city doesn’t give you any type of help. I literally looked the online site for the town, it hasn’t being updated in a year.
im not allowed
Well with an attitude like that…
Attitude? Dude I’m one step to suicidal. My attitude is the last is my problems
Nobody I guess. The world keeps fucking me even when I try.
Everyone on this planet suffers from something. You are not alone in it. The world in neutral and is not out to fuck you.
When you realize you aren’t a victim of fate, you empower yourself to achieve great things. You aren’t special, and the world is not out to fuck you over. Sorry. It’s hard to hear, but it’s a good thing. You can achieve anything anyone else can.
It’s no one’s fault, but yours. However, that’s good because you control whether or not that changes.
Absolute Bs, I want to work, do some stuff yet nobody gives me the chance. Is like I’m invisible and that’s out of my hands
“Then become someone else, grew and be better” AKA invest money and time I don’t have… I’m fucked either way
Ok, so stay in your situation, stew in your negativity, and blame the world.
You have options. They may take time, but you are choosing to suffer. We all choose to suffer or not. No one dictated what you can do but you.
Negativity? Is a reality I don’t think you understand. I don’t have access to any help. And I’m not alone. Why do you think many people low class and immigrants like me become criminals? Do you think most of them love it? No, but even criminals need to pay the bills or they will get evicted.
You sound privileged, I don’t expect you to understand. But realize that many people aren’t like you, I can’t even get a fast food job. That’s how impossible my life is.
Without detail, I’ve been to hell and back brother. No one’s going to help you but you. I hope you find whatever peace it is that you are looking for.
I’ve become more accepting as to where I am in my life.
More often, I’ve been recalling the quote from Christine Mason Miller. “At any given moment, you have the power to say: this is not how the story is going to end.”
I believe that ethos is along the lines of the meaning behind a semi-colon tattoo. As far as ‘trend tattoos’ go, I do like the idea of it.
I’ve started playing the harmonica, so I’ve gone from having no idea to being able to play some simple songs.
Nice!
It’s surprisingly fun and easy, I’ve made it this far with just a few YouTube tutorials and harmonica for dummies. Plus it’s a good sounding instrument for about £30 which is really reasonable.
Harmonica is fun because all you need to do is find out the key to a song and you can riff so easily.
Digital art.
Where I started:
How is going:
Your colouring and detailing have improved so much! Also love your style, it looks so unique!
Thank you! I love drawing bean shapes for some reason. Probably head trauma.
That actually is impressive! I like your style. Curious, how long did it take you to get to this point?
Thank you!
I really started progressing this year when I began drawing daily. Getting a phone with a good stylus helped remove barriers as I can draw anywhere. The second one was drawn on the phone.
I’ve been on and off drawing since I was little but never really met much progress. After meeting Jim Lee at a comic con where he talked about needing to draw daily to get better I decided to get this phone so I could do that. Not a huge fan of Samsung but love being able to draw anywhere.
Dayum! Nice progress
Thank you!
Meditation and it’s changed my life for the better. I control my negative thoughts now.
Same, I’m getting there. I’ve been using the steam room at my gym, since the steam forces me to regulate my breathing. It’s a crutch but it has worked wonders for my mind.
I wouldn’t call it a crutch. You’re steering your ship towards your destination in whatever way works best for you.
That’s a lovely way to see it. Thanks for the kind words.
Could you please provide any links or book recommendations for an absolute beginner? I’ve tried to approach it in different ways (apps mostly), but never actually manage to make it work and would love to learn what worked for you. Thanks!!
Being Peace by Thich Naht Hahn. That man is a master of meditation and his books changed my life. There really isn’t anything to it and if you are trying then you are trying too hard. It’s not about what you think when you meditate. It’s about letting what you think flow through you
Keep in mind though that your brain works like a muscle in meditation and, like exercise, it’s hard at first. But the more you do it the better you get.
One day all of a sudden you come across a situation where in the past you wouldn’t have been able to control your emotions, but something like a bell rings and brings you back to that calm Meditative State where you are in control.
It’s about finding peace with yourself and the world around you.
Thanks a million NineMileTower! I’ll try and find the book and start from there!
I used to make a similar sandwich with ham and spinach every day, but recently I’ve been mixing it up and cutting some mozzarella, some pickled peppers, pickles, and a variety of meat and sauce. It’s way better than what I used to do.
A good sandwich goes a long way
I’m learning to drive. After a big pause I felt like I forgot everything completely, but since I started doing lessons regularly again I can see steady improvements
Congrats! How long until you’re finished?
Long way for now, but I slowly start to see the light at the end of a tunnel :)
You got this 💪🏻
Word of caution: The light is generally an incoming train.
This july I finally realized that I have no choice but consciously change the ways I think and react to things. There has been plenty of difficult things in my life the last couple of years and after experiencing a burnout (again, I understood afterwards it’s not the first time but hasn’t been this bad before) this summer I had to look myself in the mirror and decide to start making changes, things can’t go on like this anymore, I can’t keep on living like this anymore. It’s sad that it seems often these realizations only come when one hits the bottom in a way or another.
I’ve been to a 3-year therapy and tried meds and so on, I’m sure they “paved the path” but didn’t help me comprehend why I have these troubles that I have and didn’t give me the understanding/empathy towards myself and others that is needed to actually change the thought and reaction models that are problematic, especially anger and shame issues.
Anyways I’ve been looking at videos on youtube about CPTSD and they have helped me a lot. Especially I find Tim Fletcher’s videos useful as he thoroughly looks into the underlying issues and different ways CPTSD shows up in people, just the facts as they are. He’s kind of an old school lecturer type guy, nothing fancy and shiny (needs to be taken with a grain of salt though as he doesn’t seem to have understanding on ADHD/autism and has religious aspects in some of his videos).
Of course being recently diagnosed with ADHD gives more light to why I’m the way I am. But now I’ve been able to start to work on my stuff from a different angle and it seems to take an effect! A difficult and rocky path but I suppose the first steps are the hardest.
I’m glad you found what helped you. I’ve found Buddhism to help me cope with every day struggles.
Brushing my teeth.
Recently had a root canal and a massive wakeup call of fragile teeth.
It’s been a hard habit to stick with but the wife keeps me accountable.
You probably already have one, but if you don’t; get an electric toothbrush.
Also get a water flosser for when you CBA to manually floss! Imo something is better than nothing.
Understanding computers and networking. I’m so far away from truly understanding it all, but I’m working on studying for the A+ exams so I can get the basics for entry into an IT field. All of this is so interesting to me and I genuinely love learning it!
I worked in marketing, specifically SEO, for the past 9 years. I’m sick of it/Google’s bullshit, and I want to change to a career where I can do some tech work and help people solve problems.
Look for a MSP (Managed Service Provider) for your first gig, if you can. MSP’s contract IT services to small to medium businesses that can’t / won’t hire or budget for full-time IT. You get exposed to a lot of stuff this way. Maybe half of clients use Google cloud services and the other half use Microsoft cloud services. You learn and become an expert in both.
Same with different VOIP services, different app suites, different security software, different network hardware, etc. It’s a great way to speed-run IT and get exposure to a lot of tech. Bonus points when you later move to a dedicated company. The complexity goes way down. My job post-MSP is cruising and easy compared to what I did for the previous five years.
Good luck!
Thank you so much! I was in good with my company’s IT and the IT Manager told me the same thing. I will take what I can get, but will try for an MSP. Is there a specific job type to look for to find them or just look for help desk or support tech and review the company to figure out if it’s a MSP?
I know about Dice, LinkedIn, Indeed, and I live in Chicago so maybe Built In?
I’m doing Coursera/Google’s IT Support Tech program for their certs while I read the Mike Meyers exam guide and also supplement with Professor Messer.
