If it doesn’t come entirely encased in pastry, then it isn’t a pie, it’s a bloody casserole with a hat!

Pubs that serve “pies” and then give you slop with a square of pastry that clearly wasn’t even in contact with the slop before it hit the plate should be turned into Costa coffee shops for their crimes.

(Shepherd’s pie and cottage pie are so named for historical honorary reasons, and may continue to be so.)

The calendar should be 13 4-week months that always end on Sunday.

The leftover day should be considered a worldwide holiday.

Any time there is a leap year situation, all that time gets added to this one day, like the injury time at the end of a soccer/football match.

I don’t like small tiles. I prefer wood, carpet, cement and smooth large tiles.

“Ignorant” does mean wilfully ignorant. It doesn’t just mean uninformed.

To be vacant is to have been vacated.

To be an applicant is to have applied.

To be a claimant is to have made a claim.

And to be ignorant is to have ignored something.

(Of course, not all “-ant” words seem to stand alone without their suffix–at least, not in today’s vernacular. Does an arrogant person arrog? Does a fragrant flower frag? Rob Words might have more to say about the vestigial origins of some of these.)

Can’t wait to learn how I might just be ignorant about this (by my definition or the “real” one).

I like to use tabs when I program. I like that I can be editing the same file in a network drive with my tiny screen and have my editor there show a tab as two spaces and my big screen where it shows as four. I like that when I’m screen sharing I can zoom in and bump my font size, then set the tabs to render as smaller so I don’t need to run reindent on the whole file. I like that when I’m using a boring IDE with no customization it just inserts an indentation.

I also hate auto-closing parentheses and brackets.

People who cannot return a shopping cart to a proper location should not be able to use said shopping cart.

YouTube is driving young people toward accepting dystopian thinking

We surrender language to scientific/other detail oriented pursuits too easily.

According to some, a raspberry is not a berry, but a pumpkin is. That’s dumb. The word berry existed before botanists tried (and failed) to determine exactly what it meant, and the original meaning is still way better/more useful than the botany one.

So here it is: a berry is a small fruit, which is usually sweet, and usually edible. Raspberries, blackberries, strawberries, cherries, grapes, gooseberries, currants, and blueberries are all berries. Pumpkins, watermelons, tomatoes, zucchini and bananas are not.

Other terms that have been co-opted this way include “work”, “salt”, and “rock”. I believe the fields stealing these terms should be forced to come up with their own, different words.

Peanut butter and jelly is a pastry. It’s a dessert, not a lunch.

It’s crazy to wash the oils out of our hair and replace them with conditioner. A factory cannot make a higher performance substitute to the natural

I like soggy fries. I want to eat mashed potatoes with my bare hands in public.

I also like soggy cereal most of the time. You can suck the cereal milk out of it. If you want crunchy cereal, stop putting it in liquid.

We should continue to gently correct spelling and grammar mistakes online.

We should have stuck with base 60. The sumerians had it right.

I have very suddenly started hearing a strange quirk of grammar that needs to die in a fire. I’m going to write it on an index card and burn the index card.

I swear I haven’t heard this before the 2020s: “My kitchen needs cleaned.” Not “My kitchen needs to be cleaned”, not “my kitchen needs cleaning.”

Explain to someone ESL that “My kitchen needs cleaned” has two verbs in it, one is present tense, one is past tense, combined they imply a future action. AAAH!