Yep! In my experience it’s awful and it stays awful for ever.

But just like with going to work, over time you come to accept that existence is suffering.

It really depends. You need to train yourself to focus on the important stuff and let the rest become second nature.

Driving a manual car usually doesn’t take conscious effort to do, you just… drive. But that takes practice. Lots of it.

And some people just never get there. Or they are afraid to drive, which tends to provoke dangerous situations. Or they can drive okay but don’t pay enough attention to the road.

But usually driving with an instructor is stressful, once you get your license everything will be more relaxed and easier.

When I first started driving, it was with manual. And it really helped once I realized two things:

• Being shitty at gear shifts won’t make me fail at the final test. Instructor told me as much. If I wear out the clutch and cox up the engine through repeated stalls, that’s my problem - I can torture and destroy my car through ineptitude, as long as it’s done in accordance with road safety.
• Getting used to the clutch is half the battle. Not clutches in general, but the specific one you’re driving. Once you get used to know how insensitive or sensitive it is, the rest will be a lot easier. With time (and not a whole lot of it, actually), you’ll be shifting gear without having to think much about it, just like the rest; right now you’re struggling with you many areas that require your focus. As you practice them, you will do all of them without thinking about them.

I still need a while getting used to new gearboxes whenever I’m using someone else’s car.

Oh, and a tip: be sure to memorize the gear positions, and while standing still with the engine off you can practice shifting from and to any gear without looking. That’s one less thing to pay attention to.

It gets easier with practice, I don’t know about where you live but in Portugal to get your license you can only learn manual and you have to do 40 32 hours of driving lessons before the exam. By the end of the lessons it becomes second nature. We practiced a lot starting and parking in steep climbs and even rolling starting the car as if the battery was dead. But this was my experience, it changes from school to school.

Since here the majority of cars are still manual, I believe we should learn them because its much easier to move to automatic than the other way around.

Where do you live that you HAVE to learn manual? Here in Germany you have a choice of either learning manual or automatic. If you learn automatic though you are only allowed to drive automatic cars and if you learn manual you are allowed to drive both.

Hard to say without knowing details. How’s the traffic in your area, is it a big city or more rural? What country?

Omg, stop whining. Do or do not, there is no try. If you don’t want to drive, then why are you doing this?

Driving is one of the easiest things you’ll ever do in life (wspeckally with cars built after about 1990).

If learning how to drive is this difficult for you, what are you going to do when something truly difficult comes along?

Being car free is totally possible.

Lol, OK, you do you.

Oh wow, you must learn manual, that’s ridiculous! Where in the world is that?

I’ve not started yet, but I’m going to learn automatic when I go to learn, my GF has been learning manual for over 2 years because her dad and our friend who drives said that it makes the most sense to, when in reality that’s just because of what they were told based on outdated advice.

She even has an automatic waiting for her once she finally passes, but she’s stubborn and doesn’t want to switch to learning automatic, it’s really frustrating how stubborn she is about not giving up or approaching it from another direction.

She has dyslexia and the British Dyslexic Association even recommends that dyslexics learn automatic as it’s a known thing they struggle with. She even had to write L and R on her hands, bless her.

I’ve heard some people benefit from intensive driving courses, where you do like 2 solid weeks of lessons then take the test, but no clue if they have those in your country

I’ve suggested to her, if she really wants a manual licence then get the automatic licence, then decide if she really wants the manual, as she’ll be more comfortable with roads and driving and can just focus on the manual aspect

Btw I now understand the hate towards manual cars. Automatic should be the only option

This is a big problem with people these days. You admitted you suck at driving, you’re just barely learning how to do it, but you think you’re qualified to mandate what is available to everyone else? You do not have enough experience to have an opinion that affects other people. Stick shift is completely intuitive when you know how to do it.

It definitely gets easier in my experience. A lot of the things that take conscious effort right now are going to become reflexes and automatisms with more experience. Right now you are building that experience, and there isn’t really a way to speed it up. You just need to do each action dozens and hundreds of times, until you do it without thinking.

Driving a manual car, for example, is definitely more complex than an automatic one. You literally need to manage one more thing. But do not worry about it, you will change gears a lot during your practice sessions and build a lot of experience quickly. In a few months you will probably not think much about gears, and in a few years you will be managing them without giving it a single thought.

Fun anecdote, I recently got a new car and it is an automatic one while I previously only drove manuals. For a few days I couldn’t figure out how to start smoothly, and I was very confused… until I realized that starting mostly involved the clutch on my previous car. The first movements of my right foot used to be to keep the rpm under control while disengaging the clutch, which is just not needed on an automatic car. I was simply applying the same muscle memory to the new car without realizing it!

being too soft or too rough on the clutch is a matter of millimeters is ridiculous

On this point specifically, don’t think of it as millimetres of distance. You act based on how the car responds, not trying to hit a specific distance of pedal movement. You already do the same thing with your other foot - you don’t think “I need to press the accelerator down 55 mm”, you just press it a bit more or a bit less until the car is going the speed you want it to go at. Same deal with the clutch, there just isn’t a dial on the dashboard that tells you where you currently have it.

You’re right that driving involves processing a lot of information at once that nobody is particularly familiar with absorbing when they start. It is difficult and dangerous. That’s why there are tests and licences. But in much the same way that typing was once completely alien to you and is now something you do with little active thought, you’ll get there soon enough with the clutch too. And if you learn it now, you’ll never be caught out in a situation when there isn’t an automatic option available

Skill issue

Manual transmissions are operated almost entirely by “feel”. Once that sinks in, it’s a lot easier.

If you can, go find a quiet street, parking lot, or any place with an incline. Practice stopping in the middle of the incline and taking off without stalling. Don’t stress out when you inevitably stall. You will and that’s ok. If you can master starting on a hill, you’ll find that the rest of it comes a lot easier.

With the transmision in 1st and your foot on the brake, release the clutch very slowly until the engine starts dragging just a little. Slowly take your foot off the brake. You’ll know the clutch is in the right spot if it keeps you from rolling backwards. At that point, start to accelerate and let the clutch out slowly. Continue to accelerate and up the hill you go.

Don’t hesitate to hit the brakes at any time if you feel like you’re going to roll backwards. Better to stall than to roll back into someone behind you. Depending on the gearing, you may be able to start in 2nd and that will keep you from having to worry about shifting in the middle of the hill.

Don’t panic. Learning is good. If someone gets upset with you because you’re inexperienced and stall out then screw them. They should try to remember what it was like to learn how to drive. It just takes practice, practice, and more practice.

It becomes easy with practice, and driving a manual is not distracting at all once you get the hang of it

With enough practice, driving becomes second nature to the point that you don’t really think about it. This goes triple for manual transmission cars because you have so much control over the behaviour of the vehicle that it almost feels.like.an extension of yourself. The learning curve is a pain but the payoff is worth it.