• Snailpope@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    My foreman would always say “Love my job” in a happy tone after anything bad happened on a job site. The happier the tone, the worse it was

  • Hikermick@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Fun fact: in America asking “how’s it going?” is just a greeting, nobody really cares

    • Agent641@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Brits ofen say “You alright?” As a substitute for “Hi.”

      Pretty jarring when you’re not used to it. Id think “God, I must look like shit if they’re genuinely checking on my welfare!”

      • Captain Aggravated@sh.itjust.works
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        4 months ago

        Yeah Tom Scott did one of his linguistics videos about that, he had a word for it but some questions aren’t really questions they’re basically just rituals, though rephrased a different way makes them genuine questions, and when you have major dialects of the “same” language like British and American English, we use different ones. “Are you alright?” is basically a noise of greeting in Britain and an expression of genuine concern in America, while “How are you?” is the reverse.

        • feedum_sneedson@lemmy.world
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          4 months ago

          Chinese version 你吃了吗 or variations on that, although it’s not used so much anymore. Literally means “have you eaten”, except it doesn’t really require an answer. I imagine it came up in that video, but it’s a good one.

          • batmaniam@lemmy.world
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            4 months ago

            Literally means “have you eaten”, except it doesn’t really require an answer.

            Grandmothers in every culture

      • Aceticon@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        When I moved to London, I remember the old lady at the laundromat addressing me as “love”

        I was like: “Damn, over here my charm even works with old ladies”

        As it turns out, calling somebody “love” it’s just a way of addressing people in some English regions.

    • Thteven@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Won’t stop us from having a conversation or even just bitching about something that is randomly bothering us.

    • Monument@lemmy.sdf.org
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      4 months ago

      I always respond thoughtfully to people I don’t like. Then I ask how they are and watch them squirm.

        • Monument@lemmy.sdf.org
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          4 months ago

          It me!

          Which is also probably why I give this answer. Because it irks me to some degree that we just throwaway important questions like another human’s well-being.
          If someone responds without being tripped up, I sorta know they’re my kind of person.

          • shneancy@lemmy.world
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            4 months ago

            oh same haha, if someone asks me a question they’re getting the answer, i don’t care that they expected a “i’m fine”

            • Monument@lemmy.sdf.org
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              4 months ago

              I just realized that I contradicted myself. I said that I use this with folks I don’t like, and then that when I use it, if someone responds well, that I know they’re my kinda people.

              I don’t exclusively use it with folks I don’t like! I also throw it out playfully. It’s validating when folks respond in-kind.

    • Aceticon@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      It’s really like that everywhere, in my experience.

      It’s at most small talk, not a license to dive into one’s life story.

  • I_Has_A_Hat@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    “I’m doin.” -I am not doing well and I don’t want to talk about it. But I’m also too exhausted and shattered to keep lying about my mental state for the sake of social niceties, so I’m hoping my vague, neutral statement will either convey what I’m feeling, or you’ll fill in the blank with whatever you want to hear. Just as long as you stop asking how I’m doing.

    • Neato@ttrpg.network
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      4 months ago

      My coworker once when I asked him a hard question: “Don’t make me lie to you.”

      I still think of that a lot and try to work it in when someone asks me an impossible question.

      • brbposting@sh.itjust.works
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        4 months ago

        when someone asks me an impossible question.

        I think that response actually works for the loaded question:

        “Have you stopped beating your wife?“

        • Buglefingers@lemmy.world
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          1 month ago

          Easy answer: No

          Though someone can assume another answer it should be followed up by another question, such as: why not? Then you can explain: “Never started” for instance

          Though the answer of “don’t make me lie to you” is still a good one and prevents further questions

  • WhiteRabbit_33@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    “Too blessed to be depressed” - they’re a Christian fundamentalist who is depressed but trying to convince themselves otherwise. You should run.

    • vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works
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      4 months ago

      This isnt small talk, this is a survival mechanism to figure if the person will enact violence on you or not. Optimally you want the response to be empty words, grunting, or being told to fuck off.

      • brbposting@sh.itjust.works
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        4 months ago

        Optimally you want the response to be empty words, grunting, or being told to fuck off.

        US/DE/both, did you mean?

        • vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works
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          4 months ago

          I was referring to US culture. The most exposure to Deutsche culture is through part of my family culture and that ancestor left back when the HRE was still in living memory and not even old living memory.

    • PugJesus@lemmy.worldOP
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      4 months ago

      A friend of mine, married to a European, said that I should have been born in Europe, not the US, due to my hatred of small talk.

      • Aceticon@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        It really depends on the country and people’s personality.

        In my experience in Southern Europe people tend to love share stuff about themselves (and will easilly go into their life story) whilst in Northern Europe getting anything about them without having a long acquaintance with them is very hard if not impossible.

        Apparently the Finnish are very averse to small talk (pretty much the opposite of Southern Europe).

        Then there are also other variances - in Britain they’ll tend to portray themselves as better than they really are feeling, in Portugal they’ll tend to complain about life and things and in The Netherlands, if you do get them to open up, they’ll be very matter of fact.

        After language, it’s maybe the hardest kind of thing to get used to when going to live in another country.

    • PugJesus@lemmy.worldOP
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      4 months ago

      Our national holiday consists of drinking and playing with explosives at nighttime. You do the math.

      It’s generally a very cheerful level of suicidality though! Would be awful to bring the mood down by making a suicide all somber or some shit.

      • vaultdweller013@sh.itjust.works
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        4 months ago

        Also one of our best known sub-cultures is one in which the concept of health and safety are slurs when used outside of work. I should know I am a relatively cautious Redneck, that just means I actually keep the medkit nearby for if shit goes worng.

    • fossphi@lemm.ee
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      4 months ago

      Wouldn’t jump into a running vehicle. But wouldn’t try to try to climb up a cliff

    • PugJesus@lemmy.worldOP
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      4 months ago

      “Good enough” is “My head is barely above water and I’m wondering if it’s worth the effort”

    • ghen@sh.itjust.works
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      4 months ago

      Good enough= My day is shit, My week is shit, My life has been shit, but it’s not as shit as other people so I don’t have the right.

      • loweffortname@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        4 months ago

        It’s the suffix that hits hardest:

        … it’s not as shit as other people so I don’t have the right.

        ~at least that’s what my friend that I’m asking for definitely said~

  • redprog@feddit.de
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    4 months ago

    I’m German and for me, “can’t complain” means I have nothing to complain, I’m fine, nothing special

    • Classy@sh.itjust.works
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      4 months ago

      I find Germans have an easier time replying to things very frankly and without garnishment or humor. I can ask a German, “How are you?”, and he may reply with “I’m fine” and it can be taken at face value.

      Americans tend to be more, I don’t know, conflict avoidant in their replies? There’s more expectation of subtext, of irony, and it’s not as typical to take “I’m fine” at face value.

      “Can’t complain” is another good one. It’s often heard as, “I can’t complain [because nobody would listen anyway]”. Tone is important, as is environmental context. Blue collar workers at the site say this, yeah their day is going to shit. Your buddy says it over drinks, maybe he’s having a neutral, normal time of life, or maybe his life is going to shit and he’s giving the ironic answer to avoid diving into his real issues, while still communicating that things are not perfect.

      Last week I was asked how my day was. It had been a perfectly normal, decent day, good time at work, beautiful weather, and my reply was “Life’s a peach”. I got back, “That bad, huh?” Yeah, the American habit of taking genuine expression and searching for a darkness under it can be tiring sometimes.

      • AngryCommieKender@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        Boss makes a dollar,

        I make a dime,

        That was a poem,

        For a simpler time.

        Now the boss makes a hundred,

        And the workers a cent,

        While he has employees,

        Who can’t pay their rent.

        Why wait till the boss makes a million,

        And the workers make jack?

        It’s high time we riot,

        And take our world back.

        • intensely_human@lemm.ee
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          4 months ago

          The traffic light simply would not turn green
          So the people stopped to wait
          As the traffic rolled and the wind blew cold
          And the hour grew dark and late

          Zoom-varoom, trucks, trailers,
          Bikes and limousines,
          Clatterin’ by — me oh my!
          Won’t that light turn green?

          But the days turned weeks, and the weeks turned months
          And there on the corner they stood,
          Twiddlin’ their thumbs till the changin’ comes
          The way good people should.

          And if you walk by that corner now,
          You may think it’s rather strange
          To see them there as they hopefully gaze
          With the very same smile on their very same face
          As they patiently stand in the very same place
          And wait for the light to change.